Last Thursday the world watched a giant balloon floating over the state of Colorado thinking it took off with a 6 year old boy inside. Local authorities were contacted, air traffic in and out of the Denver airport was grounded and many people were glued to the TV following the path of the balloon and praying that the boy inside is safe. The telecast lasted for over two hours and the story was plastered all over the internet. When the balloon finally landed in a field and people came to know that there was no one inside, more panic ensued. Speculations were flying everywhere; Did the boy fall off? Was he trapped inside? Was there a chance for him to come out of this ordeal alive? A widespread search for the boy commenced only to discover that he had been hiding in his attic all this time and fell asleep. The world took a collective sigh of relief and offered their gratitude that the boy was unharmed, but the next day the mood changed as their were speculations that the family planned this whole thing and duped the entire world. After all, they wasted many resources that could have been used elsewhere. Latest I've heard is that police is investigating this whole thing as a hoax. They found out that the family is very TV savvy and have already appeared on a reality show. Also upon examining the balloon, scientists have concluded that there is no way the balloon could've taken off with the little boy inside as it was not sturdy enough.
This story captivated me also as it was unfolding but in light of all this new information, I cannot help but wonder what has happened to us? Why are we in such a need to get noticed? Why are parents putting their kids through such stunts to make a quick buck or get famous? This exploitation cannot be healthy in any way. I remember being a kid and life was very simple back then, but for kids growing up today there is so much pressure, so many expectations. The family that pulled this stunt for 15 minutes of fame probably won't think it was worth it when they are slapped with a number of criminal charges. They won't think it's funny when the CPS will come in their home and take their children away. The consequences for such actions are never good. Look at John and Kate! What a mess they have made of their lives. If they weren't doing the reality show and went through the same ordeal in private, maybe their kids wouldn't have gone through what they are going through right now. I bet it's not fun to hear about or watch your parents flaunting their dirty laundry in public. These kids will probably have to hear about this and suffer consequences for a long time because of their public exposure.
Another thing that annoys me is parents entering their children in beauty pageants. All the fake teeth, makeup and focus on vanity can go through a kid's head. I don't know why parents don't learn from child artists who, after losing their fame, can hardly function in society. They usually fall victim to drugs, sex and alcohol. Children are meant to live their childhood not to act like adults before their time. They should be taught how to play with their dolls, action figures, ball and bikes, not how to act in front of the camera so that mommy and daddy can live their dreams at their expense.
R
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Nadia's Story
Here is another Story I wrote not too long ago. Just want to see what you guys think.
His name was Javed and he first saw Nadia in a shopping mall. It was love at first sight for him and from that moment on he made it his mission to find out everything about her. He would stand outside her college just to get a glimpse of her, send her roses and chocolates and write love letters with his blood. It didn’t take long for him to win her over as she found him insanely attractive. They began exchanging love letters and having discreet phone conversations. One day Javed suggested that they meet at his friend’s house. Nadia was reluctant at first but Javed assured her that she had nothing to be afraid of, she can trust him. Her trust in him grew when he kept his word and didn’t try anything she would feel uncomfortable with. They started meeting regularly and every time Javed gained a little more mileage with her. Within a couple of weeks they were making out and Nadia liked how it felt. She liked all the sensations her body felt when she was in his arms and she liked how his lips tasted and every time they parted she wanted more of him. One day Javed extended an invitation to spend the whole night with him. Nadia was certainly tempted but she was also very afraid. Somewhere in the back of her mind she feared the unknown but she was hopelessly in love with this guy and just wanted to live in the moment. She recruited one of her friends to go to her mother and father to ask if Nadia can spend the night at her house. Nadia knew that it was a difficult task as her parents did not allow her to stay away from home for too long, especially at night. After much cajoling by her friend they finally gave in. Nadia carefully packed her overnight bag with scented lotions and a nighty she had bought a few days ago and headed to meet Javed. He picked her up on his bike at a local bus station and they drove off to his friend’s house. The tiny apartment was filled with fresh flowers and lovely romantic lighting. Nadia excused herself and went to the bathroom to change. As she slipped out of her clothes, her heart started beating really fast. Meanwhile, Javed put on some soft music and settled on the bed waiting for her. She stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes planted on the floor as she felt extremely conscious in the semi revealing nighty. When Javed saw her he let out a sigh. She was breathtaking and he just couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He got up from the bed and went close to her, real close. She found his gaze piercing like he could see every detail of her body. He put his arms around her and she laid her head on his muscular chest. They held each other for what seemed like an eternity. Then he lowered his head and kissed her on her forehead and went down inch by inch until he reached her lips. He held himself back but Nadia couldn’t stand it anymore. She raised her lips to his and unleashed the passion. They kissed right there standing until Nadia’s knees felt weak and her legs couldn’t stand her weight anymore. She leaned fully into his body and he led her to the bed. She laid flat on her back and pulled him close to her until his body was directly over her. He fit her perfectly. He removed his shirt and pants as she watched him provocatively. He was so handsome, chiseled to perfection. He found her staring at her and smiled. She looked away. He slipped beside her and reached for her nighty. She hesitated so he turned the light off. Slowly he removed her nighty and she pulled the covers over her all the way to her throat as she had never undressed in front of anyone, not even her own mother, not after she turned ten. Slowly Javed pulled her closer to him and she let all her inhibitions go. He drove inside her and she let out a cry but after a moment, the pain was gone and she started swimming in the deep blue ocean of pleasure.
The next morning she woke up in his arms a completely different person. Now she was a woman who just spent the most glorious night of her life with the man she loved. After that magical night they were always eager to repeat the passion play. Nadia would bunk her college and they would sneak to Javed’s friend’s house where they would drive each other crazy with desire. With every get-together Nadia was getting bolder and more aware of her sexuality but as this seemed like an ideal arrangement for Javed, she was ready to think about her future, their future. Often she would mention that she wanted to marry him and spend the rest of her life with him and he would tell her that they had all the time in the world to think about the future but right now they should just enjoy what they have. His evasive answers started to make Nadia very uncomfortable especially when she was late. She was never late. She confided in one of her friends and they went out and bought a home pregnancy test from a store about an hour away from their home. Nadia was frightened as she peed on the stick. She kept praying that it was negative and this was just an isolated event where she was a few days late but her stars had something else in store for her. When she saw two lines on the stick her worst fear came to life. She sank on the couch, sick to her stomach and unable to breathe.
She called Javed and told him that she needed to see him. He told her to head to his friend’s house and he’ll join her. When he came over Nadia clung to him and began crying hysterically. Javed became worried and tried to calm her down. After a few moments she found enough strength to tell him the truth. He was clearly surprised but he reassured her that there was no reason to panic. He also told her that he’ll talk to his parents that night and send them to her house with a formal proposal of marriage. Nadia was relieved. This is exactly what she expected from Javed. He loved her and he was ready to stand by her. She went home that night and slept peacefully while dreaming of a beautiful life with Javed and their new baby.
Four days passed since she had told Javed but he hadn’t contacted her. This was not unusual because he often had to go out of town for work for weeks at a time but time was not on their side right now because it was slipping away with every breath.
One day while helping her mother in the kitchen she felt nauseated. She ran to the bathroom and Mrs. Qureshi followed her. They say that mothers have a very strong sixth sense and her mother’s sixth sense was telling her that something was terribly wrong. Nadia came out of the bathroom and found her mother standing there. She could sense what was going through her mother’s head and she could not face her. As she headed to her room, Mrs. Qureshi stopped her in her tracks.
“Nadia what is going on?” She asked
“I don’t know, must be something I ate.” Nadia lied
“Look me in the eye and tell me the truth.” She came and stood right in front of Nadia
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Nadia tried to fight back tears. She just wanted to buy some time until Javed returned.
“Why did you throw up all of a sudden? Tell me what you have done.” Mrs. Qureshi was not about to let go.
“Mummy…Mummy…” Nadia broke down and embraced her mother tightly.
“Oh my God…Oh my God…Tell me you didn’t do anything wrong. Tell me you didn’t sacrifice our pride and honor. Tell me you didn’t shame us in front of the world. Tell me…Tell me.” She was fiercely shaking Nadia who continued to cry.
“I am sorry mummy, I am so sorry.”
“Who is he? Who is he with whom you have blackened our reputation?”
“Mummy please…Mummy please forgive me…I made a terrible mistake…Please”
“Tell me his name.”
“His name is Javed. I met him six months ago…mummy he loves me…he loves me a lot and he wants to marry me.”
After hearing this Mrs. Qureshi calmed down a bit and sat down on Nadia’s bed. She came up with a strategy where she will meet Javed and talk to him herself. Then she would talk to his parents and they would arrange a very small religious ceremony where they would get married.
Next day Nadia tried to call Javed but his phone number was disconnected. She was confused and dialed the number several times only to hear the same message over and over again. Frustrated she threw her phone and started crying. She didn’t want to believe that Javed may have been a jerk who took advantage of her and when she got pregnant with his child, made a run for it. She wanted to believe that all the things he said to her, all the promises he made to her were sincere and that he truly loved her. She wanted to believe that he wanted this child and a life together as much as she but as days went by she was getting very nervous. She didn’t have another contact number for him. She did not even know where he lived but she knew where his friend lived so one day she went over to the apartment only to find a family with two small kids living there. The woman told her that they moved in a week ago and did not have any information about the previous tenant. Nadia was clearly distraught. It had happened. Javed did turn out to be a complete jerk whose only goal was to have sex with her. Now what? What was she going to do? How was she going to tell her mother that the father of her baby had disappeared in thin air? How was she going to face the world as an unwed mother? What has she done? She was hating herself at this moment for letting a man take advantage of her like that. Surely her parents raised her to know better but Javed broke her resolve and left her to fend for herself. She was never going to forgive him and she was never going to forgive herself.
Mrs. Qureshi was sitting in Nadia’s room with her head in her hands. Nadia had just told her everything and was now sitting across from her crying. Mrs. Qureshi looked up and said,
“Stop crying. Crying won’t solve the problems you have gotten us into.” Her tone was harsh as she was angry at her daughter and also sad for her.
“There is only one solution. We must abort the child.” She said
“No” Nadia shouted and gripped her stomach with both arms protecting her unborn child.
“Nadia don’t be a fool. There is no other way.”
“No..mummy..no…please don’t do this.” Nadia lowered herself on the floor and grabbed her mother’s feet for mercy.
“Nadia we don’t have a choice. You are an unmarried girl and to get pregnant is a sin. If anyone gets a wind of this we will be outcast from the society. People will spit on us. Who will marry you?” Mrs. Qureshi started babbling in an effort to rationalize the situation.
“But mummy no one has to know. I can go away from here. Far away with my baby.” All of a sudden Nadia was talking like a grown woman and not a teenager.
“This is not possible. You will do as I say. I will not let you deprecate us anymore than you already have.”
She left the room leaving Nadia on the floor. When she got to her room Mr.Qureshi was reading his newspaper. He was unaware of all the happenings in his own home and Mrs.Qureshi preferred it that way. She knew that if her husband finds out the truth he is capable of murdering his own daughter in the name of family honor and pride. Nadia will have to do as she says this is the only way she can save the family’s honor and her daughter’s life. She decided to call her only sister and ask her to come and help her with this difficult decision and when her sister reached she did everything in her power to convince Nadia to do as being told. Nadia rebelled but ultimately made the decision to terminate her pregnancy in order to save her and her family’s honor. Her aunt stayed back for another few months because following the abortion Nadia had fallen into severe bout of depression. She had become zombie like and stayed in her room either listening to sad songs or sleeping. Her mom and aunt knew that for Nadia killing the baby was like cutting off a body part but they were also sure that she will heal with time and they were right because Nadia did recover. She picked herself up and joined a vocational class. Her life had become very routine. Every day she went to class, worked on her assignment, came home, helped her mom in the kitchen and went to sleep. She had lost her zest for life and it broke her mother’s heart to see her this way. She desperately prayed for a miracle that would take Nadia out of this ordeal and change her life. Her prayers were answered the day her childhood friend called from Lahore and said that her son was coming to Karachi for a job interview and would be staying with them a few days. Parvez came and instantly fell in love with this beautiful, quiet girl who had certain sadness in her eyes and secrets in her heart. He immediately decided that Nadia was the girl he wanted to marry. Somehow he felt the urge to take all her sorrows away and give her a life full of love and beauty. When Nadia heard about Parvez’s proposal she told her mom that she wanted to tell him the truth about her past but her mom ruled against it. She did not want to lose a guy like Parvez because she was convinced that once he learns the truth, he will not want to have anything to do with Nadia. For days Nadia struggled with the decision because she did not want to start a new life with a lie. She liked Parvez and did not want to keep him in the dark. As her future husband he had every right to know the truth; hence, she wrote everything in a letter and patiently waited for his reply. She was ready to face rejection but to her surprise Parvez’s decision was not altered. They married with all the fanfare and as promised Parvez lived up to all the promises he made and showered so much love on her that she forgot all about the past and became the same fun loving and spirited girl she always was.
His name was Javed and he first saw Nadia in a shopping mall. It was love at first sight for him and from that moment on he made it his mission to find out everything about her. He would stand outside her college just to get a glimpse of her, send her roses and chocolates and write love letters with his blood. It didn’t take long for him to win her over as she found him insanely attractive. They began exchanging love letters and having discreet phone conversations. One day Javed suggested that they meet at his friend’s house. Nadia was reluctant at first but Javed assured her that she had nothing to be afraid of, she can trust him. Her trust in him grew when he kept his word and didn’t try anything she would feel uncomfortable with. They started meeting regularly and every time Javed gained a little more mileage with her. Within a couple of weeks they were making out and Nadia liked how it felt. She liked all the sensations her body felt when she was in his arms and she liked how his lips tasted and every time they parted she wanted more of him. One day Javed extended an invitation to spend the whole night with him. Nadia was certainly tempted but she was also very afraid. Somewhere in the back of her mind she feared the unknown but she was hopelessly in love with this guy and just wanted to live in the moment. She recruited one of her friends to go to her mother and father to ask if Nadia can spend the night at her house. Nadia knew that it was a difficult task as her parents did not allow her to stay away from home for too long, especially at night. After much cajoling by her friend they finally gave in. Nadia carefully packed her overnight bag with scented lotions and a nighty she had bought a few days ago and headed to meet Javed. He picked her up on his bike at a local bus station and they drove off to his friend’s house. The tiny apartment was filled with fresh flowers and lovely romantic lighting. Nadia excused herself and went to the bathroom to change. As she slipped out of her clothes, her heart started beating really fast. Meanwhile, Javed put on some soft music and settled on the bed waiting for her. She stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes planted on the floor as she felt extremely conscious in the semi revealing nighty. When Javed saw her he let out a sigh. She was breathtaking and he just couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He got up from the bed and went close to her, real close. She found his gaze piercing like he could see every detail of her body. He put his arms around her and she laid her head on his muscular chest. They held each other for what seemed like an eternity. Then he lowered his head and kissed her on her forehead and went down inch by inch until he reached her lips. He held himself back but Nadia couldn’t stand it anymore. She raised her lips to his and unleashed the passion. They kissed right there standing until Nadia’s knees felt weak and her legs couldn’t stand her weight anymore. She leaned fully into his body and he led her to the bed. She laid flat on her back and pulled him close to her until his body was directly over her. He fit her perfectly. He removed his shirt and pants as she watched him provocatively. He was so handsome, chiseled to perfection. He found her staring at her and smiled. She looked away. He slipped beside her and reached for her nighty. She hesitated so he turned the light off. Slowly he removed her nighty and she pulled the covers over her all the way to her throat as she had never undressed in front of anyone, not even her own mother, not after she turned ten. Slowly Javed pulled her closer to him and she let all her inhibitions go. He drove inside her and she let out a cry but after a moment, the pain was gone and she started swimming in the deep blue ocean of pleasure.
The next morning she woke up in his arms a completely different person. Now she was a woman who just spent the most glorious night of her life with the man she loved. After that magical night they were always eager to repeat the passion play. Nadia would bunk her college and they would sneak to Javed’s friend’s house where they would drive each other crazy with desire. With every get-together Nadia was getting bolder and more aware of her sexuality but as this seemed like an ideal arrangement for Javed, she was ready to think about her future, their future. Often she would mention that she wanted to marry him and spend the rest of her life with him and he would tell her that they had all the time in the world to think about the future but right now they should just enjoy what they have. His evasive answers started to make Nadia very uncomfortable especially when she was late. She was never late. She confided in one of her friends and they went out and bought a home pregnancy test from a store about an hour away from their home. Nadia was frightened as she peed on the stick. She kept praying that it was negative and this was just an isolated event where she was a few days late but her stars had something else in store for her. When she saw two lines on the stick her worst fear came to life. She sank on the couch, sick to her stomach and unable to breathe.
She called Javed and told him that she needed to see him. He told her to head to his friend’s house and he’ll join her. When he came over Nadia clung to him and began crying hysterically. Javed became worried and tried to calm her down. After a few moments she found enough strength to tell him the truth. He was clearly surprised but he reassured her that there was no reason to panic. He also told her that he’ll talk to his parents that night and send them to her house with a formal proposal of marriage. Nadia was relieved. This is exactly what she expected from Javed. He loved her and he was ready to stand by her. She went home that night and slept peacefully while dreaming of a beautiful life with Javed and their new baby.
Four days passed since she had told Javed but he hadn’t contacted her. This was not unusual because he often had to go out of town for work for weeks at a time but time was not on their side right now because it was slipping away with every breath.
One day while helping her mother in the kitchen she felt nauseated. She ran to the bathroom and Mrs. Qureshi followed her. They say that mothers have a very strong sixth sense and her mother’s sixth sense was telling her that something was terribly wrong. Nadia came out of the bathroom and found her mother standing there. She could sense what was going through her mother’s head and she could not face her. As she headed to her room, Mrs. Qureshi stopped her in her tracks.
“Nadia what is going on?” She asked
“I don’t know, must be something I ate.” Nadia lied
“Look me in the eye and tell me the truth.” She came and stood right in front of Nadia
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Nadia tried to fight back tears. She just wanted to buy some time until Javed returned.
“Why did you throw up all of a sudden? Tell me what you have done.” Mrs. Qureshi was not about to let go.
“Mummy…Mummy…” Nadia broke down and embraced her mother tightly.
“Oh my God…Oh my God…Tell me you didn’t do anything wrong. Tell me you didn’t sacrifice our pride and honor. Tell me you didn’t shame us in front of the world. Tell me…Tell me.” She was fiercely shaking Nadia who continued to cry.
“I am sorry mummy, I am so sorry.”
“Who is he? Who is he with whom you have blackened our reputation?”
“Mummy please…Mummy please forgive me…I made a terrible mistake…Please”
“Tell me his name.”
“His name is Javed. I met him six months ago…mummy he loves me…he loves me a lot and he wants to marry me.”
After hearing this Mrs. Qureshi calmed down a bit and sat down on Nadia’s bed. She came up with a strategy where she will meet Javed and talk to him herself. Then she would talk to his parents and they would arrange a very small religious ceremony where they would get married.
Next day Nadia tried to call Javed but his phone number was disconnected. She was confused and dialed the number several times only to hear the same message over and over again. Frustrated she threw her phone and started crying. She didn’t want to believe that Javed may have been a jerk who took advantage of her and when she got pregnant with his child, made a run for it. She wanted to believe that all the things he said to her, all the promises he made to her were sincere and that he truly loved her. She wanted to believe that he wanted this child and a life together as much as she but as days went by she was getting very nervous. She didn’t have another contact number for him. She did not even know where he lived but she knew where his friend lived so one day she went over to the apartment only to find a family with two small kids living there. The woman told her that they moved in a week ago and did not have any information about the previous tenant. Nadia was clearly distraught. It had happened. Javed did turn out to be a complete jerk whose only goal was to have sex with her. Now what? What was she going to do? How was she going to tell her mother that the father of her baby had disappeared in thin air? How was she going to face the world as an unwed mother? What has she done? She was hating herself at this moment for letting a man take advantage of her like that. Surely her parents raised her to know better but Javed broke her resolve and left her to fend for herself. She was never going to forgive him and she was never going to forgive herself.
Mrs. Qureshi was sitting in Nadia’s room with her head in her hands. Nadia had just told her everything and was now sitting across from her crying. Mrs. Qureshi looked up and said,
“Stop crying. Crying won’t solve the problems you have gotten us into.” Her tone was harsh as she was angry at her daughter and also sad for her.
“There is only one solution. We must abort the child.” She said
“No” Nadia shouted and gripped her stomach with both arms protecting her unborn child.
“Nadia don’t be a fool. There is no other way.”
“No..mummy..no…please don’t do this.” Nadia lowered herself on the floor and grabbed her mother’s feet for mercy.
“Nadia we don’t have a choice. You are an unmarried girl and to get pregnant is a sin. If anyone gets a wind of this we will be outcast from the society. People will spit on us. Who will marry you?” Mrs. Qureshi started babbling in an effort to rationalize the situation.
“But mummy no one has to know. I can go away from here. Far away with my baby.” All of a sudden Nadia was talking like a grown woman and not a teenager.
“This is not possible. You will do as I say. I will not let you deprecate us anymore than you already have.”
She left the room leaving Nadia on the floor. When she got to her room Mr.Qureshi was reading his newspaper. He was unaware of all the happenings in his own home and Mrs.Qureshi preferred it that way. She knew that if her husband finds out the truth he is capable of murdering his own daughter in the name of family honor and pride. Nadia will have to do as she says this is the only way she can save the family’s honor and her daughter’s life. She decided to call her only sister and ask her to come and help her with this difficult decision and when her sister reached she did everything in her power to convince Nadia to do as being told. Nadia rebelled but ultimately made the decision to terminate her pregnancy in order to save her and her family’s honor. Her aunt stayed back for another few months because following the abortion Nadia had fallen into severe bout of depression. She had become zombie like and stayed in her room either listening to sad songs or sleeping. Her mom and aunt knew that for Nadia killing the baby was like cutting off a body part but they were also sure that she will heal with time and they were right because Nadia did recover. She picked herself up and joined a vocational class. Her life had become very routine. Every day she went to class, worked on her assignment, came home, helped her mom in the kitchen and went to sleep. She had lost her zest for life and it broke her mother’s heart to see her this way. She desperately prayed for a miracle that would take Nadia out of this ordeal and change her life. Her prayers were answered the day her childhood friend called from Lahore and said that her son was coming to Karachi for a job interview and would be staying with them a few days. Parvez came and instantly fell in love with this beautiful, quiet girl who had certain sadness in her eyes and secrets in her heart. He immediately decided that Nadia was the girl he wanted to marry. Somehow he felt the urge to take all her sorrows away and give her a life full of love and beauty. When Nadia heard about Parvez’s proposal she told her mom that she wanted to tell him the truth about her past but her mom ruled against it. She did not want to lose a guy like Parvez because she was convinced that once he learns the truth, he will not want to have anything to do with Nadia. For days Nadia struggled with the decision because she did not want to start a new life with a lie. She liked Parvez and did not want to keep him in the dark. As her future husband he had every right to know the truth; hence, she wrote everything in a letter and patiently waited for his reply. She was ready to face rejection but to her surprise Parvez’s decision was not altered. They married with all the fanfare and as promised Parvez lived up to all the promises he made and showered so much love on her that she forgot all about the past and became the same fun loving and spirited girl she always was.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
R.I.P. MJ
As I watched the recap of Michael Jackson's memorial on the news I couldn't help but think that he has become bigger than ever in death then he was alive. Michael Jackson was undoubtedly very talented and broke records worldwide but his recent years kept him in the news more for his personal life rather than the amazing music he made.
I remember the first time I saw Thriller, honestly it scared the crap out of me but I couldn't help myself from watching it over and over again. That was my introduction to the phenomenon called Michael Jackson. Although I was never a huge fan, Jackson's music was always around. His songs and dance moves were copied and recopied all around the world. His moonwalk became so popular that every kid wanted to perfect it. He was a legend and there was no argument about it.
Then in the late 90s things changed. He appeared different physically. Tabloids began churning stories about his numerous plastic surgeries and a skin disorder that made his color lighter and lighter. He was criticised and accused for having fondness for children and for inviting them to his house. I always heard and saw these stories with a certain indifference but last week it was revealed that he tried to return to his own childhood by giving underpriviledged children a few moments of joy. He built a massive amusement park so these kids could play for hours without a care in the world. After all that's what a childhood is all about, but for Michael it was different, much different. When other kids were playing with their bikes, Michael was in the recording studio exercising his vocal cords for hours. They blame his father who was extremely ambitious for his sons and when he realized the potential in Michael, he pushed him even harder. I don't know how much truth is in these stories but it all kind of makes sense now. Maybe he was a tortured soul who was looking for genuine love and affection that he never received from his own father. He became a father and a very devoted one indeed. He loved his children immensely and from his daughter's heartfelt speech today, one can conclude that the kids also adored their father.
It is sad to see this superstar gone so soon but I guess when you are sitting on top of the world it kind of gets lonely up there. You seem to leave the people who know you for the person you are behind and acquire a new set of entourage. The difference is that these new so called friends don't have your best interests at heart. They don't know you for you but for what you do and how much money you have. Like Britney and Anna Nicole, Michael Jackson also had many people around him who did whatever he asked them to do as long as he kept their pockets full.
Indeed it is sad and this is my tribute the one and only King of Pop.
I remember the first time I saw Thriller, honestly it scared the crap out of me but I couldn't help myself from watching it over and over again. That was my introduction to the phenomenon called Michael Jackson. Although I was never a huge fan, Jackson's music was always around. His songs and dance moves were copied and recopied all around the world. His moonwalk became so popular that every kid wanted to perfect it. He was a legend and there was no argument about it.
Then in the late 90s things changed. He appeared different physically. Tabloids began churning stories about his numerous plastic surgeries and a skin disorder that made his color lighter and lighter. He was criticised and accused for having fondness for children and for inviting them to his house. I always heard and saw these stories with a certain indifference but last week it was revealed that he tried to return to his own childhood by giving underpriviledged children a few moments of joy. He built a massive amusement park so these kids could play for hours without a care in the world. After all that's what a childhood is all about, but for Michael it was different, much different. When other kids were playing with their bikes, Michael was in the recording studio exercising his vocal cords for hours. They blame his father who was extremely ambitious for his sons and when he realized the potential in Michael, he pushed him even harder. I don't know how much truth is in these stories but it all kind of makes sense now. Maybe he was a tortured soul who was looking for genuine love and affection that he never received from his own father. He became a father and a very devoted one indeed. He loved his children immensely and from his daughter's heartfelt speech today, one can conclude that the kids also adored their father.
It is sad to see this superstar gone so soon but I guess when you are sitting on top of the world it kind of gets lonely up there. You seem to leave the people who know you for the person you are behind and acquire a new set of entourage. The difference is that these new so called friends don't have your best interests at heart. They don't know you for you but for what you do and how much money you have. Like Britney and Anna Nicole, Michael Jackson also had many people around him who did whatever he asked them to do as long as he kept their pockets full.
Indeed it is sad and this is my tribute the one and only King of Pop.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
NBA Playoffs
This is a great time of the year when NBA playoffs are going on especially when your favorite team is in it (so far...). I love the Dallas Mavericks and think very strongly that they have a potential to beat any team in the NBA if they wanted to but it seems like the team is having so many issues with injuries, personal problems and an inability to under perform. I want to go back to the year when Mavs made it all the way to the finals only to lose to Miami. In my opinion, that was the death of them. The following year they lost to Golden State in the first round despite having won the most games in the league. Last year they lost again in the first round and this year when their entry into the playoffs was doubtful, they pulled themselves up and had a tremendous run at the end of the regular season. I was so happy that the Mavs were back. Then they went on to beat the Spurs in the first round only to face the Denver Thuggets. I swear this Denver team is dirty and frankly messed up. I actually liked Chauncey Billups when he played for the Pistons but now he's one of the Thugs and what's with the birdman character. Frankly he looks ridiculous!! Throughout this series they have played dirty while Mavs have kept their composure and played with dignity. Game three was the biggest injustice to the Mavs when a corrupt official decided not to call the foul at the end and giving Carmello Anthony an opportunity to make a wide open three. I admit that Mavs can be sloppy but c'mon people give them a break. It seems to me that Mavericks do not get any respect in the league and for that my husband says that they need to win a championship and only then they will be able to shut people up. I know that Denver will win this series but as a fan I want the Mavs to get it together, make any necessary changes and come back next year with a vengence. The fans surely deserve it!!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Economics 101
I don't know about anyone else but I am really getting sick of all the talk about the bad economy. Everyone from news correspondents to wall street experts to the President are projecting gloom and doom for this country. I just wanted to go over some of the things that have put us in this crisis.
First, the sub prime mortgages are responsible for a major chunk of the this mess. So many people opened fake companies and got on this bandwagon in order to make a quick buck and many vulnerable Americans who had the American dream of owning a home with a yard and a white picket fence fell for it. Most of them knew that they did not have the credit score nor the savings to afford a home but clever loan sharks made them believe that they could own a home for next to nothing. I blame these greedy people but hold the buyers equally responsible.
Another reason for this crisis is the American culture of spending. We love to spend the money we don't have. Let's say you have ten credit cards with a combined limit of $100,000. Does that mean that you have $100,000 to spend? NO! That money is not yours. That money comes with a million strings attached because each credit card comes with very high finance charges. If you charge a $2000 TV today and pay the minimum balance every month, that TV can end up costing you more than $10,000 before you can own it and chances are that by the time you finish paying it off it's time to buy a new TV!
My favorite financial advisor Suze Orman does not mince words when she gives financial advice to people and I love her for it. She tells it like it is and does not show mercy. One thing she said that really stuck with me is that, "You do not have savings when you have debt" Most people in America do not consider credit card balance as debt because they continue to pay on it, but any balance on that card is a debt even if you have money in your savings account. She points out that the number one priority of people in these economic times is to pay off your credit card debt.
Finally, we are in this situation because there are many big executives who only thought about fattening their pocket books at the expense of hard working taxpaying people. In my opinion there should be a salary cap for every professional out there. If our President can only make $400,000 a year, is it fair for the CEO of FEDEX to make $9,000,000 in salary and bonuses a year? I would even propose to cap salaries of athletes and movie stars who make ridiculous amounts of money. They say that California is 400 billion dollars in debt. I say that if every actor in Hollywood pooled their money together they can certainly get California out of debt.
My goal is not to preach but to make people aware that we are responsible for getting where we are today and we alone can make small changes to get us out of this situation.
R
First, the sub prime mortgages are responsible for a major chunk of the this mess. So many people opened fake companies and got on this bandwagon in order to make a quick buck and many vulnerable Americans who had the American dream of owning a home with a yard and a white picket fence fell for it. Most of them knew that they did not have the credit score nor the savings to afford a home but clever loan sharks made them believe that they could own a home for next to nothing. I blame these greedy people but hold the buyers equally responsible.
Another reason for this crisis is the American culture of spending. We love to spend the money we don't have. Let's say you have ten credit cards with a combined limit of $100,000. Does that mean that you have $100,000 to spend? NO! That money is not yours. That money comes with a million strings attached because each credit card comes with very high finance charges. If you charge a $2000 TV today and pay the minimum balance every month, that TV can end up costing you more than $10,000 before you can own it and chances are that by the time you finish paying it off it's time to buy a new TV!
My favorite financial advisor Suze Orman does not mince words when she gives financial advice to people and I love her for it. She tells it like it is and does not show mercy. One thing she said that really stuck with me is that, "You do not have savings when you have debt" Most people in America do not consider credit card balance as debt because they continue to pay on it, but any balance on that card is a debt even if you have money in your savings account. She points out that the number one priority of people in these economic times is to pay off your credit card debt.
Finally, we are in this situation because there are many big executives who only thought about fattening their pocket books at the expense of hard working taxpaying people. In my opinion there should be a salary cap for every professional out there. If our President can only make $400,000 a year, is it fair for the CEO of FEDEX to make $9,000,000 in salary and bonuses a year? I would even propose to cap salaries of athletes and movie stars who make ridiculous amounts of money. They say that California is 400 billion dollars in debt. I say that if every actor in Hollywood pooled their money together they can certainly get California out of debt.
My goal is not to preach but to make people aware that we are responsible for getting where we are today and we alone can make small changes to get us out of this situation.
R
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Rise of the Machines
Last night I was watching Oprah who was interviewing actor Dennis Quaid about how his newborn twins nearly died due to a medical mistake. The babies developed some kind of infection few days after they were born and Dennis and his wife took them to Cedar Sinai hospital in Los Angeles. There due to human error they were given an overdose of antibiotics which led the twins to get sick and then treated. Now the babies are happy toddlers. My blog is not about them but it's about the change that was brought in after this error. Cedar Sinai went electronic where every medication has a bar code which is scanned by a handheld scanner which feeds into a computer and only after that the medication is dispensed. All this to avoid human error.
OK so I was touched by this story and I like the fact that change has been put in place but how come we give machines such credibility over humans? After all aren't all machines made by humans? I love something my husband says, "A machine is only as intelligent as the human being who built it." Touche.
Now lets talk about how much the humans who built these machines are dependent on them. For example, cell phones. How many of us carry practically our whole lives in our cell phones? How many of us know five numbers of our family and friends without looking at the contacts on our phone? First it was saving phone numbers on it to save us from memorizing numbers or carrying a bulky diary. Now our music, calendar, alarm, camera and Internet are all on our phones. We would rather lose an arm but God forbid if our phone should get lost. I personally love my cellphone because I can save phone numbers but is that an excuse for not remembering my mom's number? What if I am stranded somewhere and don't have my phone with me. Will my mom ever know if I am dead or alive? Scary thought huh?
Cell phones are genius and texting and email capabilities on them has made life so much easier. We can send and receive texts and emails instantly. No more excuses such as, "I was in the bathroom", because you can take it there too. But I think this texting business has gone too far. Personally I'd like to hear from a loved one when it is my birthday and not get a text that says HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! in all caps with three exclamation points at the end. Or better yet just send a message on Facebook. Now don't even get me started about that!
However there are many benefits to having machines in our homes and offices. It's time efficient and predictable but machines shouldn't replace human intelligence. God has named us superior beings over all his creatures for a reason after all. I am afraid that dependence on machines have made us complacent and also stupid. We don't see a reason to use our brains when we have calculators, computers and fancy gadgets to help us. The other day I was trying to have a competition among students in my religious education class and asked the kids if anyone had a quarter to flip. One of the students handed me his iPhone which had a coin on the screen. I looked at him puzzled, "You want me to flip your phone in the air?" he looked at me like "no dummy" you just shake it and the coin will flip a few times and then stop. Whoa! Isn't that something? All I wanted was a good old coin to flip in the air.
Another place machines are making their presence felt are in the medical field. It is really awesome that a programmed robot can perform a very complicated surgery in which the physician is videoconferenced from across the country. I don't know about you but I would want my doctor to be IN the room and NOT across the country when I am on the operating table.
Machines are great but I don't want them to take over the world.
R
OK so I was touched by this story and I like the fact that change has been put in place but how come we give machines such credibility over humans? After all aren't all machines made by humans? I love something my husband says, "A machine is only as intelligent as the human being who built it." Touche.
Now lets talk about how much the humans who built these machines are dependent on them. For example, cell phones. How many of us carry practically our whole lives in our cell phones? How many of us know five numbers of our family and friends without looking at the contacts on our phone? First it was saving phone numbers on it to save us from memorizing numbers or carrying a bulky diary. Now our music, calendar, alarm, camera and Internet are all on our phones. We would rather lose an arm but God forbid if our phone should get lost. I personally love my cellphone because I can save phone numbers but is that an excuse for not remembering my mom's number? What if I am stranded somewhere and don't have my phone with me. Will my mom ever know if I am dead or alive? Scary thought huh?
Cell phones are genius and texting and email capabilities on them has made life so much easier. We can send and receive texts and emails instantly. No more excuses such as, "I was in the bathroom", because you can take it there too. But I think this texting business has gone too far. Personally I'd like to hear from a loved one when it is my birthday and not get a text that says HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! in all caps with three exclamation points at the end. Or better yet just send a message on Facebook. Now don't even get me started about that!
However there are many benefits to having machines in our homes and offices. It's time efficient and predictable but machines shouldn't replace human intelligence. God has named us superior beings over all his creatures for a reason after all. I am afraid that dependence on machines have made us complacent and also stupid. We don't see a reason to use our brains when we have calculators, computers and fancy gadgets to help us. The other day I was trying to have a competition among students in my religious education class and asked the kids if anyone had a quarter to flip. One of the students handed me his iPhone which had a coin on the screen. I looked at him puzzled, "You want me to flip your phone in the air?" he looked at me like "no dummy" you just shake it and the coin will flip a few times and then stop. Whoa! Isn't that something? All I wanted was a good old coin to flip in the air.
Another place machines are making their presence felt are in the medical field. It is really awesome that a programmed robot can perform a very complicated surgery in which the physician is videoconferenced from across the country. I don't know about you but I would want my doctor to be IN the room and NOT across the country when I am on the operating table.
Machines are great but I don't want them to take over the world.
R
Sunday, March 1, 2009
To Eat or not to Eat
Ever wonder why foods that are good for us taste so bad? I have yet to try a low calorie food that does not taste like cardboard. Granted that foods such as Lean Cuisine and Smart ones are good for you but they contain ridiculous amounts of sodium which can make you retain water in your body...which can give you a bloated look...so on and so forth.
I love the slogan Weight Watchers has, "diets don't work weight watchers does". Yeah only until you pay a weekly fee and have to go through the humiliation of getting weighed once a week. I tried it and it worked for the most part because the worst feeling in the world is when you have deprived yourself of all the regular foods and resorted to eating rabbit food and bread that tastes like....NOTHING...you get on that scale and it shows that you have gained TWO POUNDS. But how is that possible? I was so good all week. So weight watchers does work but it's a slow process and most of us don't have that kind of patience.
Recently I followed a diet that claimed you could lose up to 9 pounds in 11 days. Now I am a big skeptic when it comes to fad diets and don't fall for the gimmick, but my co worker's mother had tried it and she lost about 8 pounds. I figured that even if I lose five pounds that would be quite an accomplishment. So I logged onto the website, paid the mandatory fees and downloaded the custom made menu which comprised of three things, Milk, Eggs and peanuts. That's it! I was supposed to live on these for 11 days!! I mean I like eggs and but eating them three times a day was a little too much for me. Still I deiced to stick to it because the $40 were not refundable and besides I had bragged about it to all my coworkers and I was not going to let them call me a liar...or a coward...or a quitter..nope that was certainly not going to happen. I told myself to suck it up and do this. To my surprise I was able to stick to it and even lost four pounds. I was so proud of myself. Then I got off the diet and gained 8 pounds.
There is no quick fix to losing weight. You have to eat the low calorie, high fiber, cardboard tasting food and you have to exercise. Believe me I read every article about diets on the Internet and follow all the latest trends. I tell my mother and sister what to eat and what to avoid like I am their personal dietitian or trainer but I always procrastinate and don't follow my own advice because I tell myself that I know all the right things to do and it's just a matter of time before I get started.
The reason I am putting all this out there is because I need to make a commitment to myself that this is the year to reach my goal weight, this is the year to get healthy, this is the year to start prevention of all the potential ailments that creep up on you as your get older, this is the year to be proud of. Maybe by reading this blog some of you will get inspired to the same and if nothing else you can throw it back on my face by saying "FOLLOW YOUR OWN ADVICE."
R
I love the slogan Weight Watchers has, "diets don't work weight watchers does". Yeah only until you pay a weekly fee and have to go through the humiliation of getting weighed once a week. I tried it and it worked for the most part because the worst feeling in the world is when you have deprived yourself of all the regular foods and resorted to eating rabbit food and bread that tastes like....NOTHING...you get on that scale and it shows that you have gained TWO POUNDS. But how is that possible? I was so good all week. So weight watchers does work but it's a slow process and most of us don't have that kind of patience.
Recently I followed a diet that claimed you could lose up to 9 pounds in 11 days. Now I am a big skeptic when it comes to fad diets and don't fall for the gimmick, but my co worker's mother had tried it and she lost about 8 pounds. I figured that even if I lose five pounds that would be quite an accomplishment. So I logged onto the website, paid the mandatory fees and downloaded the custom made menu which comprised of three things, Milk, Eggs and peanuts. That's it! I was supposed to live on these for 11 days!! I mean I like eggs and but eating them three times a day was a little too much for me. Still I deiced to stick to it because the $40 were not refundable and besides I had bragged about it to all my coworkers and I was not going to let them call me a liar...or a coward...or a quitter..nope that was certainly not going to happen. I told myself to suck it up and do this. To my surprise I was able to stick to it and even lost four pounds. I was so proud of myself. Then I got off the diet and gained 8 pounds.
There is no quick fix to losing weight. You have to eat the low calorie, high fiber, cardboard tasting food and you have to exercise. Believe me I read every article about diets on the Internet and follow all the latest trends. I tell my mother and sister what to eat and what to avoid like I am their personal dietitian or trainer but I always procrastinate and don't follow my own advice because I tell myself that I know all the right things to do and it's just a matter of time before I get started.
The reason I am putting all this out there is because I need to make a commitment to myself that this is the year to reach my goal weight, this is the year to get healthy, this is the year to start prevention of all the potential ailments that creep up on you as your get older, this is the year to be proud of. Maybe by reading this blog some of you will get inspired to the same and if nothing else you can throw it back on my face by saying "FOLLOW YOUR OWN ADVICE."
R
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Fakeness
I just don't understand the difference between being fake or being a diplomat. I know that sometimes diplomacy can be great because it can earn you some brownie points. I mean you are not going to tell your 300lb manager that she doesn't need to order that 12 oz filet mignon. I mean that's just dumb because if you do that you will get fired. So diplomacy is great if you have to save your skin or your job for that matter, but I just can't stand being fake. For instance I had attended a meeting recently and this guy was trying to say all the right things to get everyone;s attention and with every comment of his people were praising him to the sky but I just couldn't get myself to do that. Honestly I just was not impressed. Also, I can't give fake compliments. I just can't be fake like that and maybe that has hurt me in the past. I carry my emotions on my face and when something doesn't meet my approval you will see it. In my opinion that shows that I am true to myself but to others it may seem that I am arrogant or just plain rude.
So is it better to compromise with who you are just to look good in someone else's eyes? I don't know the answer but I am trying to learn one day at a time.
R
So is it better to compromise with who you are just to look good in someone else's eyes? I don't know the answer but I am trying to learn one day at a time.
R
Monday, February 9, 2009
Short Story---Me and Amanda
Hey guys I have attached a short story I recently wrote. This is completely fiction. Let me know what you think.
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It was one of those days when you just don't want to get out of bed, don't want to talk to anybody not even your husband. Doug had left for work a little while ago and I was just laying in bed telling myself that I should get up and get ready for work but I just did not have the energy. Turns out that I had caught the flu and had to call in sick. All day I lay in bed, occasionally getting up to chug NyQuil down my throat. I had no idea when Doug got in, made his dinner, fed and walked the dogs and lied down next to me at night. He nudged me a little and I let out an irritated groan. Poor guy just wanted to know if I was feeling any better. I told him that I probably needed one more days rest and I'll be fine. He suggested that I go see a doctor in the morning but I dismissed that suggestion. We did not have any health insurance and certainly didn't need to spend money on a doctor's visit and prescription drugs. My NyQuil was going to do the job; I was sure of it and right enough after two days of rest I was back on my feet.
When I got to work, I saw a new face in the store. Julie came up to me and told me about the new girl. Her name was Amanda and she had started the day I called in sick. She also told me that Amanda was going to work in the cosmetics department with me and I was to train her. Panic struck within me. The first thing I thought was that she was here to replace me. I was to teach her everything I knew and then she would take my job. Noticing the expression on my face, Julie assured me that that wasn't the case. In the last few months, sales had gone up and we needed an extra hand, still I proceeded with caution. Amanda was one of those all American types with blond hair and blue eyes. If you looked at her close enough you would think that she was quite pretty. She was certainly well groomed, had real nice skin and wore designer jeans and carried a real nice Coach purse which must cost her no less than 400 bucks! When Julie introduced us, all my preconceived notions about Amanda were put to rest. She was actually very sweet. She listened to me very carefully and took notes. She also asked a lot of questions which made me feel kind of important. Within a couple of days, Amanda was fully trained. She was pretty and smart and I decided that I actually liked her.
Over several days I got to know Amanda a lot better. She told me that she is an only child and grew up in Houston. Her parents are both school teachers so education was big in her family. She finished high school with honors and then went to University of Texas in Austin. After college she landed a big time marketing job at a multinational company and worked as a consultant for a few years. When she got tired of all the traveling she met Scott, a Safety Engineer from Dallas. They dated for four years and got married. Scott received a good job opportunity in Dothan so they both moved here six months ago. She also told me that she wanted to start a family right after she got married but after three years of trying, they have been unsuccessful.
I asked her what a well educated girl like her doing working in a cosmetics department of a drugstore and she told me that her field of work was very stressful and required a lot of commitment and she had already done that for several years. Right now she just wanted to be a mother and until that happened she wanted to stay busy just doing this.
On the way home I couldn't help but wonder how different our lives were. Doug and I were high school sweethearts and after graduation, he went to our local community college to get a certificate for a refrigeration technician. Going to college was never really an option for me because my dad had left us when we were kids and my mom worked two jobs to raise me and my brother. After high school I applied for a job at the corner Walgreen's and been here ever since. After finishing community college Doug proposed and we got married at the civic center.
We have been married for seven years and I like to think that we're doing pretty good for ourselves, I mean we are not rich or anything but we get by with what we have. With all these difference one thing that struck me as common between Amanda and I was not having any kids. After two years of marriage, Doug and I wanted kids also and we thought that it would only take a few months of trying but after six months of having sex every night, there was still no baby. We decided to take a break for a little while and let it happen, but still nothing. I started getting worried that maybe something was wrong with me and went to the doctor. After a million tests and $3,000, the doctor told me that I was perfectly allright. Then why was I not able to get pregnant? One of my friends suggested that Doug should get himself checked out but he wasn't having any of that. According to him he was in perfect health and besides all his brothers and sisters have normal healthy kids. We had several arguments on this topic but after not getting anywhere I just gave up. Now after eight years we don't talk about babies, when friends and relatives ask, we just smile and leave the room.
So when Amanda asked me if I had any kids, I was a little uncomfortable and tried to change the subject, but didn't I tell you that she was smart? She immediately figured out that we were having problems. It didn't take me long to spill my guts out to her. Somehow I trusted her because she understood me. Julie, Connie and Terry could never understand because they had about a dozen kids between them but Amanda understood and showed tremendous empathy. She listened to me complaining about Doug and his stubbornness but she also knew that I loved him. For me we were both the same even though we were not. She and Scott vacationed on exotic islands, while Doug and I would drive to Pensacola every Fourth of July weekend. She and Scott read The Times and Wall Street Journal Where Doug and I used the local paper to pickup after our dogs Brick and Fuzz. She drove a Lexus where I drove and old Buick, but even with all the differences we had this one thing in common, we were both barren. At the time I was completely unaware of the fact that Amanda was taking advantage of all the new technology that was available to have a baby. I didn't suspect anything when she took several days off to go to Houston, not even when she ran to the bathroom when she was about to throw up. It was when Terry and Julie started teasing her that I realized that she was actually pregnant! The reality of it hit me like a ton of bricks. How could she do this to me? I thought that she was my true friend and we had a very sacred bond. How could she take this one thing away from me? I blamed her for betraying me. I didn't want to talk to her, didn't even want to see her face. She knew exactly what was going through my head and she let me be. She didn't try to explain or justify anything.
It was her last day at work and all the girls decided to throw her a surprise shower. I also chipped in for a stroller. I watched her open all her presents and thank everyone with teary eyes. When it was time to go, she came up to me and hugged me. Her gesture took me completely by surprise but her warmth comforted me. She placed my hand on her belly and let me feel the life inside of her. Tears welled up in my eyes and we both hugged each other and cried for several minutes. She parted by saying that she has already said a prayer for me and that my wish will come true.
Three months later I visited her in her hospital room. She was sleeping at the time but there was a smile on her lips. Her face was clam and content. I didn't wake her up but left a little note on her night stand which said, "I am pregnant."
Seven months later Jayden James Pinkerton came in this world and as I watched his face, I knew that Amanda's silent prayer had made this possible. Today I know that she didn't tell me about her pregnancy because she didn't want to hurt me but she also wanted me to be happy for her. The day of her shower she let me experience a very private moment with her baby, because she understood.
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It was one of those days when you just don't want to get out of bed, don't want to talk to anybody not even your husband. Doug had left for work a little while ago and I was just laying in bed telling myself that I should get up and get ready for work but I just did not have the energy. Turns out that I had caught the flu and had to call in sick. All day I lay in bed, occasionally getting up to chug NyQuil down my throat. I had no idea when Doug got in, made his dinner, fed and walked the dogs and lied down next to me at night. He nudged me a little and I let out an irritated groan. Poor guy just wanted to know if I was feeling any better. I told him that I probably needed one more days rest and I'll be fine. He suggested that I go see a doctor in the morning but I dismissed that suggestion. We did not have any health insurance and certainly didn't need to spend money on a doctor's visit and prescription drugs. My NyQuil was going to do the job; I was sure of it and right enough after two days of rest I was back on my feet.
When I got to work, I saw a new face in the store. Julie came up to me and told me about the new girl. Her name was Amanda and she had started the day I called in sick. She also told me that Amanda was going to work in the cosmetics department with me and I was to train her. Panic struck within me. The first thing I thought was that she was here to replace me. I was to teach her everything I knew and then she would take my job. Noticing the expression on my face, Julie assured me that that wasn't the case. In the last few months, sales had gone up and we needed an extra hand, still I proceeded with caution. Amanda was one of those all American types with blond hair and blue eyes. If you looked at her close enough you would think that she was quite pretty. She was certainly well groomed, had real nice skin and wore designer jeans and carried a real nice Coach purse which must cost her no less than 400 bucks! When Julie introduced us, all my preconceived notions about Amanda were put to rest. She was actually very sweet. She listened to me very carefully and took notes. She also asked a lot of questions which made me feel kind of important. Within a couple of days, Amanda was fully trained. She was pretty and smart and I decided that I actually liked her.
Over several days I got to know Amanda a lot better. She told me that she is an only child and grew up in Houston. Her parents are both school teachers so education was big in her family. She finished high school with honors and then went to University of Texas in Austin. After college she landed a big time marketing job at a multinational company and worked as a consultant for a few years. When she got tired of all the traveling she met Scott, a Safety Engineer from Dallas. They dated for four years and got married. Scott received a good job opportunity in Dothan so they both moved here six months ago. She also told me that she wanted to start a family right after she got married but after three years of trying, they have been unsuccessful.
I asked her what a well educated girl like her doing working in a cosmetics department of a drugstore and she told me that her field of work was very stressful and required a lot of commitment and she had already done that for several years. Right now she just wanted to be a mother and until that happened she wanted to stay busy just doing this.
On the way home I couldn't help but wonder how different our lives were. Doug and I were high school sweethearts and after graduation, he went to our local community college to get a certificate for a refrigeration technician. Going to college was never really an option for me because my dad had left us when we were kids and my mom worked two jobs to raise me and my brother. After high school I applied for a job at the corner Walgreen's and been here ever since. After finishing community college Doug proposed and we got married at the civic center.
We have been married for seven years and I like to think that we're doing pretty good for ourselves, I mean we are not rich or anything but we get by with what we have. With all these difference one thing that struck me as common between Amanda and I was not having any kids. After two years of marriage, Doug and I wanted kids also and we thought that it would only take a few months of trying but after six months of having sex every night, there was still no baby. We decided to take a break for a little while and let it happen, but still nothing. I started getting worried that maybe something was wrong with me and went to the doctor. After a million tests and $3,000, the doctor told me that I was perfectly allright. Then why was I not able to get pregnant? One of my friends suggested that Doug should get himself checked out but he wasn't having any of that. According to him he was in perfect health and besides all his brothers and sisters have normal healthy kids. We had several arguments on this topic but after not getting anywhere I just gave up. Now after eight years we don't talk about babies, when friends and relatives ask, we just smile and leave the room.
So when Amanda asked me if I had any kids, I was a little uncomfortable and tried to change the subject, but didn't I tell you that she was smart? She immediately figured out that we were having problems. It didn't take me long to spill my guts out to her. Somehow I trusted her because she understood me. Julie, Connie and Terry could never understand because they had about a dozen kids between them but Amanda understood and showed tremendous empathy. She listened to me complaining about Doug and his stubbornness but she also knew that I loved him. For me we were both the same even though we were not. She and Scott vacationed on exotic islands, while Doug and I would drive to Pensacola every Fourth of July weekend. She and Scott read The Times and Wall Street Journal Where Doug and I used the local paper to pickup after our dogs Brick and Fuzz. She drove a Lexus where I drove and old Buick, but even with all the differences we had this one thing in common, we were both barren. At the time I was completely unaware of the fact that Amanda was taking advantage of all the new technology that was available to have a baby. I didn't suspect anything when she took several days off to go to Houston, not even when she ran to the bathroom when she was about to throw up. It was when Terry and Julie started teasing her that I realized that she was actually pregnant! The reality of it hit me like a ton of bricks. How could she do this to me? I thought that she was my true friend and we had a very sacred bond. How could she take this one thing away from me? I blamed her for betraying me. I didn't want to talk to her, didn't even want to see her face. She knew exactly what was going through my head and she let me be. She didn't try to explain or justify anything.
It was her last day at work and all the girls decided to throw her a surprise shower. I also chipped in for a stroller. I watched her open all her presents and thank everyone with teary eyes. When it was time to go, she came up to me and hugged me. Her gesture took me completely by surprise but her warmth comforted me. She placed my hand on her belly and let me feel the life inside of her. Tears welled up in my eyes and we both hugged each other and cried for several minutes. She parted by saying that she has already said a prayer for me and that my wish will come true.
Three months later I visited her in her hospital room. She was sleeping at the time but there was a smile on her lips. Her face was clam and content. I didn't wake her up but left a little note on her night stand which said, "I am pregnant."
Seven months later Jayden James Pinkerton came in this world and as I watched his face, I knew that Amanda's silent prayer had made this possible. Today I know that she didn't tell me about her pregnancy because she didn't want to hurt me but she also wanted me to be happy for her. The day of her shower she let me experience a very private moment with her baby, because she understood.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
What's for dinner: Plastic?
Yes my friends we have officially trashed the Pacific Ocean. Recent reports have revealed that the floor of Pacific Ocean is full of debris such as discarded plastic bottles and plastic bags. Since we are running out of land to dump our trash, we are using the ocean to do it. It seemed pretty wise since deep blue waters can hide all our ugly secrets but what we neglected to realize is that there is life in the ocean. There are millions of different species that call the blue waters home and they are the ones suffering from all the pollution we are responsible for. There is beautiful and colorful coral reef that is dying because plastic bags settle over them and they stop breathing due to suffocation. Recently some fishermen who have caught fish to eat from the ocean have discovered shards of plastic in their stomach. Apparently fish are chewing at the discarded plastic. We are fortunate that we have laws that prevent these fish from landing on our table, but if the pollution continues at this rate there won't be any fish left to eat.
Our city has placed recycle bins at every home and I make it a point to recycle all plastic bottles and magazines but not everyone realizes the seriousness of this problem. This is our world and we have a responsibility towards it. It is up to us to save whatever we have of this beautiful planet. We are killing fish, polar bears are going extinct and all the ice is melting. Global warming is very real and it is about time that we wake up and do something about it.
R
Our city has placed recycle bins at every home and I make it a point to recycle all plastic bottles and magazines but not everyone realizes the seriousness of this problem. This is our world and we have a responsibility towards it. It is up to us to save whatever we have of this beautiful planet. We are killing fish, polar bears are going extinct and all the ice is melting. Global warming is very real and it is about time that we wake up and do something about it.
R
Friday, January 30, 2009
Multiple babies
The news of a California woman giving birth to eight babies is the hot topic of today. When I saw the story on the news, I was interested in knowing more about it. The news said that the woman possibly had the help of fertility drugs and IVF to have multiple babies. The team of doctors who delivered the babies were happy with their success that all eight babies were safe but I was more curious about the mother whose identity was being hidden to protect the babies.
The next day I was watching the news and they said that the woman is in her 30s, she is a single mother and had six other children under the age of eight! Ok now my ears really perked up. A number of questions went through my head like; How did she get a doctor to implant so many embryos in her? Who is the father? How is she going to afford all the diapers, baby formula, clothes.....and the list goes on! Well let's tackle these questions one at a time. In my opinion it is unethical and immoral to implant multiple embryos at one time and isn't there a law that no more than three embryos be implanted at a time? Now if she is single than she must have gone to a sperm bank to get the required stuff but was there really a need to do that when she already had six kids? Believe me some people go through hell to try and conceive one child. All the emotional toll it takes on the individual and the couple is indescribable and then you hear about something like this, and you are like what the hell? Becoming a parent is an honour and a privilege and also a tremendous blessing. Bringing even one child into this world and giving him or her the best possible life is a big responsibility but for some people popping kids out has become a recreation, a business or simply a fashion. Now coming to the question about being able to afford these kids. In this economy when you hear about massive layoffs each and everyday, people cutting back on their expenses, learning to live within their means and the big corporations going belly up, how is this woman going to pay to raise 14 kids! Does she even have a job? If she does, then who will take care of the kids while she is at work? Is she even close to making the kind of money to support 14 kids? I don't know the answer to these questions, but I do know that I will somehow end up paying for her kids. My husband and I are lucky to have jobs and work very hard to budget our lives in these trying times and I don't want to pay for people who are irresponsible or make poor decisions in their lives. I know that sooner or later this woman will apply for welfare or some kind of government aid to raise her kids and as taxpayers we will be paying the tab.
I wish this woman all the best because she was given the honour to become a mother for the umpteenth time but the future of these babies concerns me deeply.
The next day I was watching the news and they said that the woman is in her 30s, she is a single mother and had six other children under the age of eight! Ok now my ears really perked up. A number of questions went through my head like; How did she get a doctor to implant so many embryos in her? Who is the father? How is she going to afford all the diapers, baby formula, clothes.....and the list goes on! Well let's tackle these questions one at a time. In my opinion it is unethical and immoral to implant multiple embryos at one time and isn't there a law that no more than three embryos be implanted at a time? Now if she is single than she must have gone to a sperm bank to get the required stuff but was there really a need to do that when she already had six kids? Believe me some people go through hell to try and conceive one child. All the emotional toll it takes on the individual and the couple is indescribable and then you hear about something like this, and you are like what the hell? Becoming a parent is an honour and a privilege and also a tremendous blessing. Bringing even one child into this world and giving him or her the best possible life is a big responsibility but for some people popping kids out has become a recreation, a business or simply a fashion. Now coming to the question about being able to afford these kids. In this economy when you hear about massive layoffs each and everyday, people cutting back on their expenses, learning to live within their means and the big corporations going belly up, how is this woman going to pay to raise 14 kids! Does she even have a job? If she does, then who will take care of the kids while she is at work? Is she even close to making the kind of money to support 14 kids? I don't know the answer to these questions, but I do know that I will somehow end up paying for her kids. My husband and I are lucky to have jobs and work very hard to budget our lives in these trying times and I don't want to pay for people who are irresponsible or make poor decisions in their lives. I know that sooner or later this woman will apply for welfare or some kind of government aid to raise her kids and as taxpayers we will be paying the tab.
I wish this woman all the best because she was given the honour to become a mother for the umpteenth time but the future of these babies concerns me deeply.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Hypocrisy
Last weekend I went to the movies to watch the much hyped and ridiculous movie "Rab ne banadi jodi", but that is not the topic of my blog but the promo that was aired before the movie started.
The movie is titled "New York". Now right when I saw this title I knew that it is not about the city or its people but rather about the dreadful tragedy we all suffered seven years ago when two planes crashed into the Twin Towers. Those of us who were there or who had loved ones there were horrified but equally troubled were the people who were watching the tragedy on TV. It was an emotional time for the country and we are still in the healing process. I can't even begin to imagine the turmoil that family members of the victims were and are going through to this day.
The media was flooded with images and stories about 9/11 and its survivors. Several documentaries and movies were also made based on this catastrophe. Some were embraced as lessons to be learned and others were shunned because they unnecessarily exploited a grave tragedy to make a profit. All said and done we were finally coming out of this better human beings be it learning that not all Muslims are bad people and that terrorists have no religion.
So why after so many years another film is being made on the same subject? The promo began with the image of sexy John Abraham trotting his stuff in the back drop of this great city. There are others who add the glamour but the crux of the story is innocent Muslims wrongly accused and suffering torture by the hands of the law enforcement and The Homeland Security. Now we all know that many Muslims did face a lot of discrimination and prejudice, even now if you look brown you are subjected to "random screening" at the airports. But this is nothing compared to what other countries do to you if they suspect any foul play. As a permanent resident of USA I have faith in its justice system even though it can be sometimes cruel. Coming back to my point earlier in this paragraph, why after so many years another film is being made on the same subject? Haven't we seen enough movies and documentaries about the same? Haven't the filmmakers made enough money cashing in on this tragedy? It makes me sick to think that a powerhouse like Yash Raj Films would back a project like this.
Now to justify the title of my blog I must say that I was in India recently only two weeks after terrorists traumatized the city of Mumbai. There was a lot of anger and frustration which is well justified. But I also saw a lot of hope, hope for change, hope for safety and hope for an honest government. One day I came across an article in a daily newspaper there which featured many acclaimed filmmakers stating a point. I decided to read on and it was about some small time filmmakers who were planning to make a film on the 26/11 terrorist attacks. In the article, more known filmmakers were angry that some people would stoop so low to exploit this tragedy. They were openly boycotting any such project by saying things like, "its unethical" and "unsentimental".
So why is it that if a tragedy hits close to home everyone starts getting patriotic and self righteous? How come these same filmmakers are willing to produce and finance a movie about something that happened seven years ago and rehash all the old wounds, but not let anyone capitalize on their own tragedy? This is the limit to hypocrisy really.
R
The movie is titled "New York". Now right when I saw this title I knew that it is not about the city or its people but rather about the dreadful tragedy we all suffered seven years ago when two planes crashed into the Twin Towers. Those of us who were there or who had loved ones there were horrified but equally troubled were the people who were watching the tragedy on TV. It was an emotional time for the country and we are still in the healing process. I can't even begin to imagine the turmoil that family members of the victims were and are going through to this day.
The media was flooded with images and stories about 9/11 and its survivors. Several documentaries and movies were also made based on this catastrophe. Some were embraced as lessons to be learned and others were shunned because they unnecessarily exploited a grave tragedy to make a profit. All said and done we were finally coming out of this better human beings be it learning that not all Muslims are bad people and that terrorists have no religion.
So why after so many years another film is being made on the same subject? The promo began with the image of sexy John Abraham trotting his stuff in the back drop of this great city. There are others who add the glamour but the crux of the story is innocent Muslims wrongly accused and suffering torture by the hands of the law enforcement and The Homeland Security. Now we all know that many Muslims did face a lot of discrimination and prejudice, even now if you look brown you are subjected to "random screening" at the airports. But this is nothing compared to what other countries do to you if they suspect any foul play. As a permanent resident of USA I have faith in its justice system even though it can be sometimes cruel. Coming back to my point earlier in this paragraph, why after so many years another film is being made on the same subject? Haven't we seen enough movies and documentaries about the same? Haven't the filmmakers made enough money cashing in on this tragedy? It makes me sick to think that a powerhouse like Yash Raj Films would back a project like this.
Now to justify the title of my blog I must say that I was in India recently only two weeks after terrorists traumatized the city of Mumbai. There was a lot of anger and frustration which is well justified. But I also saw a lot of hope, hope for change, hope for safety and hope for an honest government. One day I came across an article in a daily newspaper there which featured many acclaimed filmmakers stating a point. I decided to read on and it was about some small time filmmakers who were planning to make a film on the 26/11 terrorist attacks. In the article, more known filmmakers were angry that some people would stoop so low to exploit this tragedy. They were openly boycotting any such project by saying things like, "its unethical" and "unsentimental".
So why is it that if a tragedy hits close to home everyone starts getting patriotic and self righteous? How come these same filmmakers are willing to produce and finance a movie about something that happened seven years ago and rehash all the old wounds, but not let anyone capitalize on their own tragedy? This is the limit to hypocrisy really.
R
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